and then you just don't feel like writing...

like about a party that started out brilliantly with much excitement and merriment and good friends.
But which ended weirdly with some parts definately counting in there as aweful.

list of things I'm letting go of hopefully and some I'm going to learn from:
girls kissing girls
falling asleep when you don't know everyone (you might not be able to trust them :( )
drinking impairs people's judgement of friend boundaries
friends sometimes let you down when they drink
people have different ideas of what loyalty means to other girls
some people might not have changed

ugh... I might sound angry but I know that it applies to me too on several occasions... DRINKING MAKES WOMEN STUPID! and I'm tired of it meaning they end up liking or possibly even falling for some boneheads or means they'll obey some stupid guy and do stuff just because he asks them to!and I'm also tired of it meaning they forget to remember how they'd like to be treated by their girlfriends if it had been their ex and someone else in their position :( SIGH!
rant rant rant.

right. it had been bothering me for over enough time now... I'm going to do the whole forgive and forget thing now hopefully :)

EXCEPT for ADAM... no forgiveness. I don't care whether you can remember or not. there would have to be so much grovelling to the girl you would never make it up.

there. my peace

How to make a Sydney Key

At Mercury there is a friendly barman called Sydney
often a crazy dancin' girl named Keyna arrives
together they made this... :)

still 25 *

ooooh! so Saturday!

(just in case anyone was wondering...no I don't have any work to do today! JOY!)

Saturday I got to sleep in a little which was wonderful! then woke up and opened all my prezzies and answered all my sms'!
Linni gave me some sun for my birthday which was pretty darn spectacular!
I got some other brilliant prezzies! like:
- long gloves which reach my elbows
- a top hat
- LUFFLY badges!
- a cute little chinese piggy which I luff!
- a beautiful stripey top from kimbo
- a great hilarious top from lu ("go team Aniston!!")
- pretty cards
- bodyshop stuff from trace! luff luff!
- popcorn maker
- black beads! and beautiful earrings
- beautiful blazer from sisters!
- stripey jersey and braclet from work peeps
- DVD player from Neil!!! don't think I've gotten such a big present!!!!
and lots and lots of coolthingies in general!
THANK YOU EVERYONE!
(oooh oooh! and there's more stuff in the post! - can't wait!)

Then we went for pancakes!!!! (we have a brilliant secret pancake place in Tableview...ssshhhhhhh)

ok so after that we just sat around and chilled most of the day! Some might find that boring but I like to think now that i'm 25 I needed the nap *grin*
we made up for it in the end by heading out to mercury that evening!

I sms'd people pretty late at about 11:00 and some randoms heard from me that i probably haven't contacted for almost a year but I'd already had a few "Sydney Keys" so was well into the spirit of things by then! YAY!
lots of people replied and I continued to harrass others well into the night but luckily for them I managed to used up all the rest of my airtime by phoning Aimee from my bag and leaving a nice half an hour voicemail heee heee.

They played out favourite songs! Lovecats! Funky Music!
We sang lots - "we didn't start the fire, it was always burning since the worlds been turning"
and of course there was MASSIVE amounts of boody shakin goin on! Clemens was GREAT! and boy can that Gaylin dance!!!

We met a rather odd couple: Blonde 31 ex stripper who REALLY seemed to want to get together with Neil... or Gaylin...not sure... she seemed quite taken with them both
Her boyfriend I think tried to explain that he was a New Zealand Rugby player who owns a club in cape town now...BUT none of it was really making any sense.
(very scary)

anyway...FUN FUN FUN! i HAD SO MUCH FUN! THANK YOU EEEEEVERYONE!!!

(sorry to Trace tho for trying to pimp you off to a certain DJ? teehee...I'm trying to cut down on that I promise! I luff what he said tho! have been giggling about it now for days!!!
- "so, do you feel like breaking all the rules?" -
I mean c'mon! tis brrriiilllliiiant! however did you resist?)

we even made the most spectacularly quick and dramatic exit I've ever made! all of us gathering ourselves up in about one minute and singing our Bohemian Rhapsody out the door and into the street.

aaah 25... you didn't let me down at all... I loved you

25 *

and no photos taken :)

so the nervousness that i was feeling about this intimidating age suddenly disappeared! "who cares"! yay!

Friday it was roaring down with rain but having promised leeetle Tammy for the 2nd time that Kimmi and I would come through we thought we best not let her down again? we do after all value our lives you know *grin*

So we grabbed dear Aimee for the gal's car and tortured her all the way there with as many 80's hits as possible and threatened her with Goldfrapp should she get the directions wrong! mwahah Cruel you say? well don't worry she got a GOOD moan in about it!

The Genitalia gig was great! with Tam niiiice and tipsy on stage! THAT'S rocknroll! go tam!
Kat, the Ror, Danie, Brett, Aimee, Kimbo, Jen and myself (plus more o tam's friends) cutting a nice rug!
lots of raucous shouting and cheering!
I even got a birthday shout out from the band! Thanks Tam!!!! that was a really cool present!
except for random drunken people trying to bash into poor kat things were a lot of fun with several nipple shows from the Ror!

We then went on a Neil hunt as we'd been receiving odd sms' about some kind of test tube UCT party but by the time we got there it was over so we went off to try ol' Gandalfs for a change.
= more dancing + more shots + wedgies courtesy of sliiightly drunken Keyna + MORE SHOTS and Aimee drinking vodka....turns out she should never do that? whoops heheh

well that was friday :) shall write about actual birthday later!

oh almost forgot...kimmi's car did smell like luffly yummy lemon and herb potato wedges... and still does days later! *grin*

the year ahead? hehehe

TAURUS20 April – 20 May

LIFE: Luck comes with greater effort this year – as if you're walking through a blizzard to reach your destination. But you'll get there – and be even prouder of yourself when you do. Besides, you're attempting big things – so the challenges are bound to be greater. Be kind to yourself – and proud of each little step.

LOVE: What are you after? Is it friendship, love, romance, affairs or marriage? Send out your orders now. And accept every invitation (there'll be many!). One word of caution: let love grow at its own pace. There's no rush.

WORK AND MONEY: You have friends in high places – all of whom are happy to help. Even so, money comes in many different ways this year – often through partners and relatives. You'll probably change jobs after September, finding new opportunities to explore your talents. Watch any deals done in March, July and early November – they're not always what they seem.

aha!

it's another one of those days where I suddenly go " oh good!!! :D I can put off this ulcer thing till september due to promises and commitments! why on earth and how can I be worrying about it right now? just relax and be normal for a bit *pheeew*"

well... as normal as I usually get!

funny how you can worry so much about stuff that you forget how little you can do about it all!
why do I feel like I keep telling myself this? must actually read back and check that i haven't written this all too many times
if someone else notices I'm droning before I do... tell me :)

good flipping gracious

DO YOU KNOW WHAT DOESN'T HELP???? :) hmmmmm???

being born on a cusp!!!!
so you think you're getting things worked out in your head about your job, life, blah blah watching manga again, seeing old friends.

so but then you check your horoscopes and they're of course completely different and give you even more to think about because clearly you're one of those nuts who sometimes can't help listening to them? the problem with haveing two is that its even more worrying when they both tell you things that seems to certainly be happening in eeery kind of way.
So which one do you ignore?

also.. whatever you do... don't look at the love horoscopes of 2006 of the people you care about! it's craziness and all rather odd.

yay to being crazy! and to think this mail comes right after my other blog's entry about none of this having to be such a big deal? hope I can just keep asking myself whether I'll care about any of this when I'm 80 or whether I'll just be so happy because my luffly goldfish are still with me and happily making bubble faces to remind me it's feeding time!
*smile*

preeety lights!

aaaaah... winter is here!

this morning was horribly windy and cold but when I finally hit the veiw from lover's lane the lights were so so beautiful. I think I do actually enjoy winter?
there will be lots of challenges definately what with everyone supposed to not be using their heaters and eskom realizing that everyone will so warning of power cuts... but as long as I have my wonderful feather down duvet and some hot chocolate I should survive it!

I am currently wishing I could move Tamsin's gig to another less windy rainy night tho? brrrr.... I'm cold just thinking about it :S

ooooh but my head is more filled with dreams of being able to afford this beautiful corset I found this afternoon *sigh* I'll have to sacrifice the impossible wish of changing the weather :) .... and not fix my poor little broken car this month...

worthy of a blog entry

this morning on the way to work i travelled at 120km/h at least twice
this morning I made it to work in 20min

even tho this means I might be here longer today. it was worth it!!!!


:)

for Kimbolina

"look kimmi a sunrise"

right!

about one minute after blog entry they announce a competition to see the red hot chilli peppers in London.
*grin* well I guess seeing them too would be a nice bonus...

erm... *help* having a moment here

ok... so there are a few things I've been thinking and daydreaming about affording this year.

-nano pod and little minolta "my own manga pretty" camera being 2 of the smaller things.
-fixing all the things that have gone wrong with me car in the next month and affording it's service being on the bigger side of things.
-BUT visiting UK friends would be always top of my list and other traveling and stuff and helping my family and forming some more savings plans to help with my future!

now... have started fixin up CV...planning out portfolio...posting temporary online portfolio...and browsing jobsites
I've started this because it's kind of clear to me that I have to move on to get more money to afford well...stuff?

BUT *ping* brain finally switches on... yes I'll have more money and maybe afford more stuff? maybe? but sort of less time as well... will be working harder, less leave?
and then *ping ping* "I wanna visit!" argh!
stupid laziness and travel thoughts are actually almost stopping me!

what the hey...*sigh* I'm really going to have to work on this whole ability to prioritize ANYTHING in my life.

:P I stick out my tongue at myself for suddenly getting these stupid serious thoughts.
and I'll analyze it all later... but not now. will let it simmer

MITTENS

I must buy mittens one day! or get an aunty to knit them :)

"OH noooooooo!!!"

Yes so as I usually do in the morning while Liz drives I let my mind go for a bit of a walk.

I saw the Elvis lady and contemplated trying to wave at her again, I said Wentworth Millar's name a few times because that's always fun and then I started thinkin of Simon's last day at work, how they might torture him/what the surprise is (although he keeps thinking it will be nice? what a more positive person he is! I'm usually very suspicious of surprises hehehe) and then also....what I would draw if I get time today as a farewell to work pic.
BUT THEN...Simon's last day at work... Simon's last day at work...tap tap tap on the shoulder goes the late arriving thought...
WHO THE HEY AM i GOING TO E-MAIL FROM NEXT WEEK!?!?!?

ok yes :) so I have more friends but darnit! I'd just gotten used to having an extra distraction from work!

sigh!

Just so you know Si... this is going to suck! so seeing as though you're also one of the only people I know who might read me blog I thought I'd tell ya! how I didn't click until now I dunno
:)
hope you have an awesome surprise worky thing and let me know how it goes?
I hope I get time to draw you a pic!

the longest entry...

Aha! Yessereee I am back from Joburgh and it was GREAT!! Not that I feel rested or anything but still :)

Well we were meant to arrive in Joburgh at about 8pm however due to weather conditions we were grounded for a good hour longer than expected! Of course I notice then that Neil is starting to breathe funny and sweat profusely at which point he lets me know that he MIGHT be slightly afraid of flying?! Eeeek! Argh! “stewardess, could we have extra vodka in this corner?”

Thankfully after about 2 and a half of those leeetle vodka bottles Neil’s mood improved miraculously and we were both happy to see Deon and land safely *grin*

Natalie is wonderful! I really think Tamsin will like her when they meet? They’re about the same age and both compared to me have boundless energy I swear when it comes to dancefloors and rock music! Not that I am bumping myself up to “granny Keyna” status quite yet but I was exhausted by the time we eventually got to Deon’s flat that night :)
The Doors is definitely one of the most fun alternative clubs I have ever been to!! It’s an old cinema converted into dancefloor and stage with the DJ high above handing out bottles of champagne to those who last longest in “jumping circles”. BEWARE the jumping circles! They’re pretty darn dangerous – I had my shoe fly off once, Natalie had her neck hurt by someone’s ring (I believe Deon is prime suspect) and at some point while jumping I was held back by another person’s foot and went flying towards the ground instead! I am nicely bruised again on the same spot from my car tumble earlier in the week.
It also has a downstairs bar near the entrance, an upper balcony area that looks onto the dancefloor and a large outside balcony… BUT most importantly… THE BATHROOMS ARE DECENT! I mean they have toilet paper and more than 2 cubicles and everything! Aaaaaaaaaaaah bliss!
Met some nice friendly people there including a drummer named Ipi who was asking why he couldn’t find more black alternative bruthas in the Cape… I had no answer? Anyone? Anyone?


Saturday started late and with much recovering from “skyrises” that Natalie had fed me and loads of woolies food. We then went off to go and view Melrose arch and afford a coffee due to our tight budget. Wandered around Moyo downstairs! It is beautiful down there! Dark and cave-like with the most attention paid to detail I think I’ll ever see sometimes. This was my second walk-around in the place and I was still hmmmm whats a good word? I think I’ll use “agog”.
We all plan on sipping some drinkypoos next time in our corner we found!
Also it was at this point where I think I became obsessed with trying a wheatgrass shot!

Reminder 01: WE MUST DO THIS DEON! Damnit!

That evening we took a nice long drive through to Pretoria missing the lightening again :(

Reminder 02: EVENTUALLY I must see a Jo’burgh/Pretoria storm!

We went out all that way because we’d found out that’s where the Coca Cola Colab afterparty was apparently at but apparently the 45 000 people at the concert didn’t get the memo! Hehehe
Ah well! It was ok there… there were meant to be 4 dancefloors: Metal, Goth, Alternative and Retro.
Sounds amazing doesn’t it? Except only two of the dancefloors were open, the Goth one downstairs and the Metal one.

Woe betide the person who tries to request something other than those two genres!!
Basically you just get ignored until you start asking around and chatting to people there…then you get sarcastically told “…THIS isn’t Cape Town”
Er…ok… I’ll just head back to my more open friendly less snobby city shall I?
After a brief pause to register that “wait yes… this person IS being an IDIOT!” I said something along the lines of “CLEARLY” glared at them and then burst out laughing! Silly children!

Other than that incident tho I had quite a bit of fun! The place is astoundingly big for an alternative club even with half of its dancefloors closed so you can explore for quite a while! Plus with the drinks nice and affordable as well there’s always ways of entertaining yourself :)

Ok! Sunday we woke late-ish again and went through to Rosebank Mall thingy as I’d gone and been an idiot and lost my pills! DOH! Spoke to and offended person at the Clicks by referring to them as Chemist… once again my apologies “Jonathan the PHARMACIST” – sorry and thanks for your abrupt help hehehe
The Mall does also have a really cool flea market thing on Sunday which we had fun browsing and I bought a keeewl Mobil oil top! I think it’s secondhand? Well when I went to pay they guy said “oh cool! You’re buying Dave’s old top! I loved this thing!”
*grin*
Whoever this Dave guy was must have been cool! Lol!

It was the day of the malls as then we went off to Menlin which was too big so we didn’t really stay long. Just ate, had smoothies thought about having a wheatgrass shot and then headed off to my family.
The family is always fun to see! Aunty Elra is crazy in a wonderful kind of way and has, what I’ve come to call, a feeding disorder! My tummy wasn’t grumbly once while staying there! It wasn’t given a chance as there was always meal and then pudding on the way every 2 hours I swear! Lol! Or at least that’s what it felt like :D
Just hung around mostly otherwise and got taken to Kolonade the next day for MORE mall walking… I’m not too sure what else people in Pretoria do? Other than going to pubs and clubs in the evenings? Hehehe this might explain why my cousins are able to drink so much when they visit?

So now we’re on the last evening in Jo’burgh… :( much much sadness.
We go get a stamp at the Doors, head back to Deon’s Flat and then decided to go to meet Neil’s cousins at Sandton square! A few cocktails later we finally head back to the Doors to go and make good on our stamps which entitle us to R5 drinks :D
When we got there… the electricity was out…
HAHA Capetonians just can’t escape the darkness :P

I was tired so decided to leave the boys to catchin up on cars, girls, farts and whatever else boys need to talk about (:P hehehe) and decided to take nap till electricity came back on. That however only happened at 4:00 am *grin*
Keyna = coma girl

Our last day: GOLD REEF CITY!!! YAY!!!!
Cheesy tourist stuff here we come! But it was great!!
May I recommend the
Miner’s revenge (flippy upside downy twisty seat thingy),
Anaconda (large hanging rollercoaster with more loops and corkscrews than the cobra = more fun),
The Golden Loop (just whatever you do… BRACE your neck against the seat!!! Unless you too would like to hear your vertebrae crack at high speed :) )
and if you’d like to be thoroughly wet… definitely do the log ride and the other boaty one!
I repeat! It was great :) and a nice way of ending our trip on an upnote I think.

Thank you again Deon for letting us mess up your flat and for all the driving you did!
I miss you!! And now I have extra person to miss tooooooo… say Hi to Natalie from me!! Can’t wait till you guys visit sometime!

The Champion Idealists

Your Type is ENFP
Strength of the preferences %
Extroverted Intuitive Feeling Perceiving
33 25 62 11

ENFP type description by D.Keirsey

ENFP type description by J. Butt and M.M. Heiss

Qualitative analysis of your type formula You are:
moderately expressed extrovert
moderately expressed intuitive personality
distinctively expressed feeling personality
slightly expressed perceiving personality

wait!

someone please tell me if I'm being greedy???

argh...

Ahem... ok I can leave early again because had my salary review. Very short and to the point.

I went up by 6%
From about R5500 to R5900.

Liz and I have made a deal. I will refrain from actively jobhunting until the design office has been sorted out more.
As in we've hired another person and sorted her out as to how things work. Then if I cannot get another review I'm on my way outta here :(
sad but true cause I am so very comfortable and relatively happy. I will really miss it here.

Sigh... ah well! Can't be a sad panda all day long can I? :)

Things you should learn relatively soon after turning 18

you know...When I was 18 I remember thinking that 25 was so old? so mature and responsible and that I'd definately have moved out from home, be in THE most stable relationship, considering buying some property, going to church on sundays, having very chilled braais with select friends and have what I could with certainty call "my career".

:) what i didn't think was that I would still be doing silly things that you'd expect a teenager to do?

so here is a little list of things I learnt yesterday: (feel free to yell out "duh" cause some of this should be obvious)

- it IS s possible to be hungover for 24hours ?!?! that shouldn't be allowed should it?
- cough syrup and incahol do not mix! sigh!
- even tho you crave milk with your hangover always prep your tummy with a few glasses of water first! (unless of course your intentions ARE to make cheese fast?)
- Sometimes you might be an unlucky girl who like me should learn that at certain times of the month you CANNOT handle your alcohol! (luna can be a bitch)
- do not wear your glasses if you feel you might be ill! (thank you kimmi for pointing them out to me before going to the toilet....sigh I washed them thoroughly last night)
- do not be too surprised if you have been stupid enough to get THAT kind of drunk if you wake up the next morning with a hall's lozenge stuck to your body, there is always a perfectly "reasonable" explanation! Your bra will always become the most obvious place to hide things at short notice

I am pretty sure there are more to mention but considering my brain still feels a wee bit lame I'll have to get back to you on this. Besides... even if I don't remember anything more from this particular evening... It turns out I'm nothing like the 25year old I described at the beginning and I reckon I've got a few more obvious lessons to learn :)

Brokeback Mountain

Right. If we can for one moment try and forget that i am one of Jake Gyllenhaal's biggest fans (Shush... I know that's difficult :)...I would like to now to put in my 5c worth of Brokeback Mountain praise!

I mean I won’t lie…I did blush and squirm a leeeetle at the sex scene near the beginning? But not half as much as I’d prepared myself to and if I'm extra honest I tend to panic and try change channels on the TV sometimes when I'm in a shy mood? It doesn't really make sense I know.
But really! Very good movie! Excellent performances by both actors and Michelle! I love [erformances where speaking isn't necessary to get emotions across? You kinda can just see the awkwardness, the playfulness and later the love. You can see on her side the betrayel she's' feeling and understand it? It’s NUTS!!! It really is tragic!
The thing is it's terrible because it's a story of an affair. I mean it is about forbidden love because they were men but you can completely identify with it because affairs between two people who love each other but just can't be with each other are happenning everyday and have been happening forever. And people always get hurt and relationships always suffer and take strain and people will always question whether it's worth it and whether it should ever have been allowed to happen and whether you should strive for what you think will make you happier and take a leap or whether you should stay where you are and be happy with what you've already found
or whether the whole thing is just inevitable?
Is it that if it happens it was MEANT to and then you follow along the ride and handle the rocks in the road as they appear.

then again... it could mean little of this to me and I could have just enjoyed the movie because Ang Lee and all his actors are brilliant and it's a very GOOD story.

Back to normal non analytical Keyn!
GO ANG LEE!!!
I really will add it to my list of movies I like!
Let me know if you see it?

Next gonna watch Tsotsi!!! Can’t wait!

OOOOOH... exciting!

right... first post...and

isn't this the same feeling you get when you have to make an impromptu speech??
I remember this feeling